I’m sure I’m not alone when I say being an adult is EFFORT. It’s not even the bigger stuff like finding a job or learning to drive, it’s the smaller stuff that naive 15-year-old me never realised I’d have to do. Things that are just, well, dull.
Here’s 15 things I never realised my adult life would involve.
1. Changing the head of a mop. I mean, it’s quite obvious that if you own a mop you’d need to replace it at some point, but I didn’t realise HOW often I’d need to go mop-head shopping. Snore.
2. Dusting skirting boards. WHAT. WHY. UGH.
3. Remembering bin day. I’m awful at this. And subsequently I never realised just how much negative impact forgetting bin day would have on my entire life. It’s honestly the worst.
4. Budgeting. Or rather, keeping such a tight control on my finances. When I was younger, I thought by my twenties I’d own my own house, be out shopping every weekend, have a nice car, an amazing wardrobe. Money worries were not a factor in my life according to my younger brain. But my GOD I was wrong. (If the ‘expenses tracker’ in my bullet journal is anything to go by, anyway).
5. Spending so much time doing admin. Life admin. Things like renewing insurance, and checking which bills have been paid, and chasing meter readings take up SO much time that could be spent, I dunno, drinking Rosé and watching Netflix and doing anything BUT life admin.
6. Travelling. Not the fun kind that involves aeroplanes and hotels and beaches. The kind of travel to visit your parents, or get to work, or go to meetings. I just never anticipated spending so much of my life just getting around.
7. Wearing pyjamas, with my hair shoved on my head, and no makeup on for the majority of the time. When I was younger I used to think (LOL) that I’d be super glam, always dressed up and looking my best. Which the postman, and Deliveroo delivery man, and the United Utilities guy from this morning can all confirm is not the case.
8. Rounds. Me and my pals don’t do rounds – everyone drinks different stuff and it’s just complicated. But when I got a proper adult job and started weekly pub trips, I was quite shocked to find that rounds are the norm? And they’re particularly awful when it’s a week until payday and the ONE drink you planned to buy turns into buying 7. Woe is me.
9. Replying to emails. I mean, yes, obvs at work you need to reply to emails, but I didn’t realise so many of my weekends would be taken up just typing?? And not the fun msn-with-your-mates kind I enjoyed at 15, the serious adult-y kind that involves bank statements and gym price enquiries.
10. Pretending to the delivery man that there’s someone else in so they don’t judge because actually the huge chinese is all for myself. Yup.
11. Dusting off DVDs I never have time to watch, CDs I never have time to listen to, and clothes that don’t fit me anymore. But not being able to throw them out because hoarder.
12. Buying candles that I purposely don’t burn. Because they’re display candles. Likewise buying pillows and cushions I throw on the floor as soon as I get into bed. Because appearances.
13. Meal Plan. Because it turns out if you go to the supermarket without a plan, you end up with tons of great stuff you can’t make anything with. And a year’s supply of mini eggs.
14. Buying fake flowers because real ones are impossible to keep alive. Which is the exact reason I can’t trust myself to get the puppy I assumed I’d own by 21 too.
15. Mute group chats. Apparently your mates buzzing your phone up every 30 seconds isn’t the dream, it’s actually pretty annoying when you’re trying to get things done that don’t involve discussing someone you went to school with’s new facebook post. Who knew?
So there’s my 15 things I didn’t realise my adult life would involve? What are yours?